Okay, so yesterday was kind of break down and whine day. Now that I got that out of my system, today is plan of action day. What am I going to do to find more enjoyment in the day to day?
Well, a couple of plans came to mind. The first is to take a class. Not a class for credit, but a class for enrichment. So I looked at the schedule of my grad school and found the perfect class: "Writing Your Life's Adventures." It starts on the 20th and lasts a month. We meet each Thursday from 7-9. I think it may be one step to finding a little more pleasure during the week. Plus I'm hoping for a little fire under my seat to get me moving in accomplishing a goal I've had since my first creative writing class in high school: become immortal through my writing.
The second thing that has me putting a smile on my face is the intention to attend the Rick Steves Tour Alum reunion in January. It is in his hometown, Edmonds, and I think he visits the reunion as well. I would take a personal day on that Friday and leave for Washington on Thursday after work. It wouldn't be a long stay, but I think it would be worthwhile. I think I may be able to use my frequent flyer miles for that trip if I can get a reasonable ticket. Plus, I have many acquaintances out there, so hopefully I can take care of accommodations.
The last thing that lightened my spirit was hearing back from my tour guide. I had some questions for her, and she said that once she is done with her tours, we can try to possibly talk on the phone. She has experienced so much and she is a great resource that is willing to share information. I look forward to our conversation.
It is funny to think of what other action plans I have come up with to solve this very same problem. Usually as school starts and fall sets in, I get a little lost. Each time I try to find something to bring me back. It seems that they are temporary fixes. I probably look like I can't stick with anything, but it is all about being happy in the moment and having that excitement, even if it is short. Some things I have done in the past to try to remedy the mind plague include: grad school, trip planning, my first blog (Out of the Cave), my next blog (The Sunday Chef), online travel writing class, letter photography, photography business, this blog, a dog, and I know there is more. I think I am becoming more ADHD as I age. Some things have stuck, so I guess that makes my way of thinking not so horrible. I wonder what other people do to get by.
Just when you think I'm done blabbing, I'm not. I wanted to share something that means a lot to me. I just finished watching a movie and it is one of those movies that makes me feel alive. It makes me want to pursue my passion, even if I don't know what it is yet. Whenever I think of my passion, I think of the possibilities with writing. I've collected some quotations from influential people. These quotations actually are only from a short span in my life, maybe a year, but they mean so much to me. Here they are:
"Your emotions will make you a good writer." --Dad (#1 influence)
"The fact that you work hard at your writing and you are excited about it--call it talent, but I call it good. I think you're an excellent writer and I think you can write very effectively. Why? You enjoy working hard at it." --Mr. Halterman
"Writing is about honesty and taking risks." --Mr. Halterman
"I think that once you become really interested in anything and you commit yourself to it, you'll get pretty good at it." --Mr. Halterman
Another is not a quote, but a memory. In my humanities class junior year we had to write a paper about The Illiad. We worked for so long on our thesis. I remember meeting with my teacher and she told me that if I worked hard enough on my paper, I might be able to publish it someday. I've gone through times where I took this as a teacher trying to motivate a student, but no real backing in the statement. For this moment, I want to believe what she said, not as a way to encourage me to work, but as a way to bring out the possibilities. I will have to look up what my thesis was and see the potential. I got a B on the assignment, so I must not have reached it.
I have another moment. During my creative writing class, we were to write three poems. My first poem was very cliche and I tried to stun my reader, but it was expected. I remember my good friend got a gold star for her poem, but mine left for more to be desired. It is so funny how even in high school, a little shiny sticker can influence motivation. So my next poem I really worked hard. I took a scientific phenomenon (of course) and turned it into a more emotional and real spectacle. The day after turning it in, he talked to our class about a poem that moved him. That nearly brought tears. Guess whose poem that was... I got the gold star! It needed work, and was far from done. As my teacher said, "revision is terrible freedom." It was the most amazing moment to know that I could create something that could move somebody. This is what I want to do.
I rarely want to revisit high school, but when I think of who I was becoming in my writing classes, I can't help but want to go back. I wonder if I would have had a little more time, if new options would have jumped before me when considering a career. The French say it best: c'est la vie.